All my work obligations finished up on Friday. It was pretty exhausting, with little time to really explore my surroundings. (We work 8:30-8:00 Tues-Fri in the lab.) The previous weekend I went to Osaka to rendezvous with Nate and Mei, who flew in from Kaohsiung, Taiwan. That trip, while fun, wasn't exactly relaxing -- we stayed out until about 5 am on Saturday night, I think. Let it suffice to say that Osakans are astoundingly great partiers. That evening will go down in the history books as one of my all-time favorites.
Since finishing up at HU (which actually is in a Hiroshima suburb), I spent one day in downtown Hiroshima with my friend Hideaki and his wife Yukiko (sorry if I misspelled it, Y!), and then I got on the bullet train to Tokyo. (More on the bullet train later.) In Hiroshima I had originally planned on seeing both the Hiroshima Peace Memorial Museum and the "Shrine Island" of Miyajima. However, the previous night Hideaki and I drank too much sake while celebrating with our co-workers, so we got a late start. There was only time for the Peace Memorial. Fine by me -- it was really amazing. I've been saying that every American who visits Japan should go to the Peace Memorial. Wrong. Every human should visit it. I could go on and on about this, but I won't, because I'll get too sentimental. Just know that you have to make a pilgrimage to Hiroshima if you're ever in this neck of the woods.
Anyway, I'm in Tokyo now for the "vacation" phase of my trip. It's a short vacation -- I leave on Election Day. That's right, I will depart Tuesday evening and travel back in time to Tuesday morning when I land in the States. I'm like the election-altering version of the Terminator. When Obama wins, you can thank my time traveling.
Exploring Tokyo's off to an interesting start. I got up late, because, well, it was my first chance to sleep in on this entire trip. I explored the grounds of a shrine right next to my apartment. I found some spicy nabe in an alley near the train station. I was about to hop on a train when... rumble, rumble. You know that sound.
Next thing I know, I'm bare-assed over a Japanese squat toilet in an underground shopping mall. My hotel toilets have been, let's say, "modernized Western-style" toilets, so this was my introduction to the ol' squatter. The experience could have been worse, I suppose, but it also definitely could have been better. Hence why I'm blogging now when I should be out: just letting the Imodium kick in.
I know I promised to talk about the bullet trains, but I'll save that for the next post. It's more important now to discuss Japanese toilets. And not the squat-type. Those are just what you imagine: sort of a trough with a hole and a flush handle. No, I want to talk about the other kind. These are a symbol of so much that is amazing about Japan. You sit down, the seat is warm. (This startled Nate in his Osaka hotel, and he nearly jumped through the roof. He's such a spaz.) You think to yourself, Oh, I could get used to this, but only if the seat were not quite so warm. No problem, the temperature is adjustable.
But there's more: There's a control panel to your side. That's right, this sucker's a bidet. But how is it possible? Where does the spray come from? You press the "Back" button to find out. It has an illustration of a butt getting sprayed with water. You hear a little electric motor, yet it seems like nothing is happening. Actually something is happening -- namely, a little retractable sprayer is inching its way toward your nether regions. Then, all of a sudden, BOOM! Ass blast!
Too. Much. Pressure. You search the control panel frantically, and you realize the pressure is adjustable. You hit the "-" button about 3 times, and now you're thinking to yourself, Oooh, yeah...
When you're done, you push "Stop." The sprayer retracts, and then you can hear it cleaning itself. But there's one button left on the controller. It says "Front," and by the illustration, it's clearly for the ladies.
Or is it?...
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